Golden Kaleidoscope: Here I am

Here I am

"If they hadn't told me I was ugly, I never would have searched for my beauty. And if they hadn't tried to break me down, I wouldn't have known that I'm unbrekable."-Gabourey Sidibe

Bodysuit- Here

These are some photos I recently did for Curvysta Magazine. These photos weren't used for the magazine so I'm posting them here. These gorgeous photos were shot by Bree Woodley who is also this years face of 2014 Full Figured Fashion Week! All of these photos except one was edited. Even though I love these, I was a little hesitant to post them because you see all of my flaws (I know, I know, I still have my insecure moments.) After I read a poem by Kitty K. Free I felt inspired to post the photos here. Below is an excerpt from the poem "What I've grown to love."

At this moment if feel pretty,

There are times I feel beautiful,
Still there are too many times when I’m down on myself,
When I think I’m ugly,
And I just feel blue.

I look at pictures of myself when I was a child almost in disbelief,
I was really a cute little girl,
But my peers made me feel like the ugly duckling, the black sheep.
It makes me sad when I think of what I let them take away from me,
My pride, my self-esteem, and all of my feminine dignity.

Now I look in the mirror and I love what I see.
I look better naked than cloaked,
If I could I would walk around in my nakedness for all to see.
My big brown lips, and my big n’ brown thighs.
My nappy nappy hair, and my almond shaped, slanted eyes.
And my full round derrière, looks so good it’s damn near a sin,
And my beautiful, wonderful, magnificent, dark brown skin.

                                   -Kitty K Free

Confidence is something I work on daily. There are days when I feel like the ugliest woman on the planet. My clothes look awful, my face is breaking out, I'm the only person sweating on the train, or I'm being talked about for wearing an outfit a woman my size shouldn't be wearing. On days like those I talk to myself in the mirror and force myself to find something I love about me. I smile at the ones who laugh and talk about me as I'm sitting right in front of there face. The one thing I absolutely love to do is read old positive comments on my Instagram, facebook, blog and email. You have no idea how some of your words have not only inspired me but changed my life. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Thank you for reading!

Make sure you check out Kitty K. Free's website for more awesome poems!


  1. I usually have the same plus size problems! I'm been chunky every since a little girl! Some times it bothers me and sometimes it's ok! But when I see more plus size women branching out to us *plus size women* that's what make me comfortable in my own skin! Thanks so much for that♡ ... you really inspire me!!!!!!!!! �� �� �� �� �� ��

  2. You are simply beautiful and inspirational, and you are killing that body suit. You look amazing!!


  3. beautiful photos! and the woman in the photos is beautiful also... sometimes it's hormonal, the weather, flashbacks, our here and now moments--all of this affects how we feel about ourselves...continue being the best one else can do it better...

  4. Such a beautiful message from such a beautiful lady!!! You inspire me to keep pushing and working on my confidence journey! Great post!!!

  5. I loved this message! Although you're obviously human, lol, it was nice to know that my #wce doesn't feel "on" all the time and has her off days too, cuz Lord knows I know that feeling! Love your blog posts!!