Golden Kaleidoscope: I got next.

I got next.

No more excuses! Some of us have the self-destructive habit of putting others before ourselves. We push our dreams and aspirations to the side in order to please others. While, some of us make up excuses in order to block ourselves from pursuing our passions, because we are afraid of failure. When do we start going after what we want? What is it that makes us encourage our friend’s dreams but push our own to the side?

I received this dress from S.W.A.K and I love it. The dress comes with straps but I made it my own and tucked the straps in. This dress also comes in black.

Some of us have the self-destructive habit of putting everything before the pursuit of our dreams.  We use the wants of others, and even our daily responsibilities, as excuses to stop us from going after our passions.  While at the same time, we encourage our friends to chase their dreams.  Why is it that we see the possibilities and the paths for their success, but not our own?  When do we see the path clearly for ourselves and start pursuing our own dreams?   

I have a pattern of creating ideas, working on them for a while, and then stopping myself from going all in.  My concepts are grand, and seem farfetched either creatively, financially, time wise or all three.  I think sometimes I say and/or do things in order to defeat myself, because I'm scared my ideas might actually work.

I'm a worrier. I analyze how much could go wrong, instead of what could go right.  Meanwhile, I'm busy encouraging my friends to go for theirs at all cost. There's this strange, uncomfortable comfort in half ass pursing your passions. One foot chasing the other, while trying to stand still, just in case it doesn't work out. “At least I'm putting in some type of effort. That counts for something, right?” Wrong!  People don't respect your half-assing, when they know you can do more.  As the saying goes, “nothing good happens in comfort.”

So, now I'm telling myself and others like me, “we got next!" It's our time to turn our dreams into reality. Fear of pursuing a dream is some lame assness and is no longer tolerated in my circle. I've waited long enough, practiced long enough, and put in enough work to go ahead and put both feet towards success. There may be bumps, scratches, and wrong turns, but I’ll keep at it until I reach the top. And so should you!

Special Thanks to Kitty K. Free for all of your editing help. You're the best! Major shouts to Fat Leopard Photography for capturing great pictures of me!


  1. I love this!! Im with it def on go mode! I got next! Btw!! You look beautiful and gorgeous your curves make strapless dresses look amazing!!!

  2. Let me start by saying you look awesome!
    I love love love this passage!

  3. I've been watching you grow since my TMP Admin days and you've reached your momentum on the rise to your peak and I'm so proud of you Essie! Regardless of anything you've been a humble, positive and beautiful individual since DAY 1! I don't believe you got next because your already there chile lol! Stay strong and focused and you will reach your peak. I'm aiming for my next, you've got it girl! Keep reaching for the stars <3

  4. This post was right on time. I've been coming across so many people and readings that discuss purpose and passion..surely God is trying to tell me to move it. I once heard that we get ideas b/c we can bring to life - you are chosen. Do your thang!

  5. Awesome read thanks this is where I am currently residing tired of giving my time and wfforts to othees and I don't know how to chase my dreams